1. |
The I.E.D. Of Love
04:03
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The I.E.D. Of Love
Not to freak you out or cause alarm but my love is like a roadside bomb, from out of nowhere, body parts are contorted everywhere and then you’ll be blown to pieces, scattered chunks and tiny bits. Sure, there’s blood and gore and the floors covered in shit.
My love is like an i.e.d., I got the i.e.d. Of love. Improvised explosive device, my love shrapnel will change your life. There you go just minding your business, then from out of nowhere comes the boom of love.
My wuv could leave you dead or maimed, post traumatically stressed with an injured brain. I’m that sexy motherfucker, hiding on the side of the road. Here you come along with not a care in the world, I patiently wait just for you and when your close enough to touch that’s when my love goes boom.
My love is like an i.e.d., I got the i.e.d. Of love. Improvised explosive device, my love shrapnel will change your life. There you go just minding your business, then from out of nowhere comes the boom of love.
My love is like an i.e.d., I got the i.e.d. Of love. Improvised explosive device, my love shrapnel will change your life. There you go just minding your business, then from out of nowhere comes the boom of love.
My love is like an i.e.d., I got the i.e.d. Of love. Improvised explosive device, my love shrapnel will change your life. There you go just minding your business, then from out of nowhere comes the boom of love. When my love goes boom. When my love goes boom.
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2. |
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Lock And Load (Welcome To Iraq)
you lock and then load as you leave the gate. yeah sure, stay alert, stay alive is great if it kept you and your battles out of them bodybags. the army is always good for a fucking laugh.
because you’re alive then you’re not, look who came home in a box.
blown to shit by an IED, in a lightly armored HUMVEE.
really it’s for the best, consider yourself blessed
you could have survived, been traumatized for life.
you could’ve returned totally lost and confused and burned relationship bridges with a short fuse.
instead you had died, for what you gave your life? oh yeah, for god and country because freedom isn’t free.
you could have enlisted, for reasons just like me. lacking in skills in todays fucked up economy.
so depressed, feeling that you have nothing left to lose an understanding that you have nothing better to do.
so now, i lock and then load before going on the road.
keeping twenty nine in the magazine, can’t risk jamming the m-16.
got my flack vest on tight, kevlar don't fit quite right.
schooled to be a mechanic, a comedy so tragic.
they needed a machine gunner for convoys, your job means squat when you deploy
because now i’m behind the fifty, the glass is half empty
in combat you do horrible things to other human beings.
someone came back home with a bad case of the ptsd’s and a good ole’ brain injury, enlisting was a failed suicide.
welcome home natey, christ, it’s been a long time.
i mean sure your standing here but you’re still over there
and we’re all pretty certain that you’re not the same person.
you returned from the tour, joined iraq veterans against the war
became an atheist, a militant anarchist.
so then you lock and then load, spell checked a suicide note
copied and pasted off word, a status update of worth
logged onto Facebook, trolled a last look
posted suicide latter, boy doesn’t that feel better?
you, you even added several clever hashtags, like so long fuckers and whose got the bodybag?
you slashed up your veins, your screaming in pain.
you’re running around panicked, this is not how you imagined.
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3. |
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Mortar Attack At Camp Cooke (Grab Your Weapon & Go)
time to get to the bunker because those mortars started to fall, got to get to that bunker because mortars started to fall. crammed in side by side, got no room to sprawl. you gotta get up, grab your weapon and go (repeat x3), because where the next mortar falls, nobody fucking knows.
waiting for a head count to see if anyone died, waiting for a head count to see if anyone died, standing here in the dark for an all clear to be verified. uh-oh, it looks as if not everyones accounted for. oh-no, it looks as if not everybody is accounted for. are they late on arrival or a casualty of war?
when he turns up, we can all go back to sleep, once he turns up, we can go back to sleep, gotta be up in three hours, got no time to weep. it’s awful what happened to blue, we just got the news, mighty awful what happened to blue, we just got the news. well, back to the mini-mobiles with just an hour to snooze. you gotta get up, grab your weapon and go (repeat x3), because where the next mortar falls, nobody fucking knows.
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4. |
A VBIED At Castle Gate
01:42
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A VBIED At Castle Gate
doing security detail at castle gate, iraqi civilians looking for work had to wait. who would of guessed a v.b.i.e.d. would detonate, the images of carnage i cannot escape. body parts here and there, what a blast, burning bodies and the critically wounded left me aghast.
a couple of car bombs gone off in the morning time, they went boom-kaboom, it was so malign. security inspections was the paradigm. up on this perch, the view from the tower, it looks like day laborers took a fire shower and across the road, they would also burn, applying for work at an iraqi security firm. the message not to work with americans had been confirmed.
back on this side near the entry way, it was blood and gore with med evals on the way. the smell of death was in the air, iraqi national guard and civilians weren’t aware that 18 would die with 40 critically wounded would happen there.
so you can try your best not to come undone but the onset of psychological trauma has begun. your going to spend many years in therapy, continuing to fight a war in your head mentally. june 6th, 2004 will stay with you permanently.
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5. |
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I.E.D. (Improvised Explosive Device)
all of our guns, all our weapons can’t stop unpredictable methods. i.e.d., were you for me? i.e.d., the world can see that you were meant for me. on a convoy they’re hard to notice, are they behind this neurosis. i.e.d., were you for me? i.e.d., the world could see that you were meant for me.
explosions appear and sharpness flying, in a matter of seconds I could be a-dying. a little bad a-luck could end your life. say goodbye to your kids and wife.
all the kevlar, all of the gear, can’t do a thing about this fear. i.e.d., are you for me? i.e.d., we will see if you were meant for me.
boom-bee-boom-boom boom boom-a-boom-boom
the roads been cleared, e.o.d. gave the green light, doesn’t mean dangers nullified. i.e.d., waiting for me. i.e.d., now we will see if you and i were meant to be.
all of the death, all of the carnage can leave your soul tarnished. i.e.d., were you for me? i.e.d., the world can see that you were meant for me.
the warlocks on and it’s not a-working, the roadside bombs a-bursting. upper armored a-vehicles can be a benefit but you’re still within death deaths grip.
especially gunners, they’re aiming for you, you’re the most vulnerable, it’s true. i.e.d., you’re for me. i.e.d., now i can see what you’ll do to me.
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6. |
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On Convoy In Iraq (Thumbs On The Butterfly)
god damn, we were on convoy in iraq, on the .50 in the lead gun truck. bump and smash making vehicles crash, if you don’t move your gonna get fucked. well, i survey my surroundings with thumbs on the butterfly, if you don’t respond to a warning shot, somebody might die and then with a boom bang i unloaded on the whole gang. well, how was i to know from afar there was a family in the car? we were shooting and a bashing, smashing and a laughing, they were dying and not moving, ran off the road with a swooshing.
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7. |
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Psychological Trauma (Post Deployment Blues)
i’ve got problems, the psychological kind. the kind of problems the dsm-5 defines. while in the army, i deployed overseas. while in iraq, i scored some ptsd. came home, detached and alone to uh-oh psychological trauma. well-a, well-a, well-a uh! did you kill? did you kill? did you kill anybody? did you see? did you see? like any dead bodies?
i killed three, i know of for sure. for moral injury there is no cure. not to forget the many murdered bodies at the hands of my so called battle buddies. coming undone, a downward spirals begun because of oh, uh psychological trauma. tell me more, tell me more, what was it like over there? tell me more, tell me more, did you bring home souvenirs?
leading the convoy, behind the .50, feeling suicidal, hope to be put down by an i.e.d., up in the turret, feeling the wind in my face. wishing that sniper small arms fire will put me in my place. put me down, six feet in the ground, uh oh this psychological trauma. i’m so glad, i’m so glad that you made it home okay. we’re so glad, we’re so glad, did they throw you a parade?
if there is a god, he or she’s an asshole. a year of combat can really take a toll. it’s been about a decade, i still feel numb. incapable of expressing emotion. years of therapy seem to be wasted on me, oh uh psychological trauma. what’s wrong? what’s wrong? what’s wrong with you? why can’t you? why can’t you? just get over it dude?
i’m trying, i really am. i fight the urge of dying by my own hand. i distract myself with songs and a family life, i’m alive because of my kids and my wife. i’m safely assuming they make me human but oh, that psychological trauma.
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8. |
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Military Sexual Assault Culture Rock
womyn in the military go through a certain hell, not just on the battle field do the dangers well. sexual harassment in this culture is a normal thing, sexual assault is encouraged when no one does a thing. let’s kill, perpetrators, let’s kill. let’s give them rapists a new thrill, if you go on red you’ll get killed.
private murphy was fed up with unwanted advances. specialist jones had enough of no means yes romances. soldier boy rapists get protection from their chain of command, the victims life will be ruined if she makes a stand. let’s kill, perpetrators, let’s kill. let’s give them rapists a new thrill, if you go on red you’ll get killed.
jody said this is for the 1 out of 3 and for the countless unreported that no one will see. sgt. rapist was about to find out what that means, once he heard jody’s rifle sing. let’s kill, perpetrators, let’s kill. let’s give them rapists a new thrill, if you go on red you’ll get killed. victim blamers get killed, sexual assault enablers get killed, rape apologists get killed.
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9. |
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Self-Destruct (Not All Wounds Are Visible)
i’m feeling real anxious, self conscious too. right now i really hate myself, i got the combat blues. not all wounds are visible, they’re are some you cannot see. such as traumatic brain injury and ptsd. gearing up for another war, got bombs for syria, they’re going to bomb iraq, again and again. perpetual war is in style, it’s all the rage and all the innocent people dying will be lucky to make the back page. i want to take a razor and dance it up my arm, i’m getting in the mood for some good old self harm. draw some pictures with my blood, put them up on the wall. maybe one of a puppy playing with a ball.
i’m going to self destruct and that’s a-okay, everyone keeps telling me , it’ll be okay. hear i go again, spiraling out of control, nobody seems to understand what war does to a soul. i’m not sure how much more of this that i’ll be able to take, anything that bends and bends will eventually break. somebody please tell me how to go about, fighting these urge to blow my brains out.
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10. |
The PTSD Kitten
02:49
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The PTSD Kitten
what does ptsd and kittens have in common, can you guess? yes, they are both cute and cuddly and loved from afar at best. oh, the sympathetic hearts will bleed and go out to them, maybe even donate some money or buy a ribbon but you shouldn’t get too close or let them into your home, they’ll scratch up your furniture and destroy your garden gnomes. christ, they’re tearing up everything, making a mess of your things, now it’s in the corner crying hysterically. just a moment ago, it was as happy as could be, climbing the walls and chasing a shadow, now it looks angry. clearly the veteran suffered trauma, ptsd of course comes with issues, tell us are you put off from the effects of abuse? this isn’t what you had expected, the idea looks much different than the reality, your patience, compassion and understanding can only find a home in fantasy. it’s up all night and making noise, shedding and smelling up the place, rescues and veterans can be found in shelters, shell shocked, staring off into space. beware of the ptsd kitten, mewing and hissing, looking for blood. beware of the ptsd kitten, it only wants your love.
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11. |
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The Veteran Affairs Waiting List Song (Fuck The Troops)
welcome back soldier, you returned in one piece, you survived another tour. you were stop lossed but now your time is up, a veteran of the war. welcome home trooper, you got your discharge, now your back in your hometown. how does it look? how have things changed? can a life for you be found? it won’t be long before the symptoms of combat appear and are profound.
have you failed to adjust to the civilian life? and a hard time finding work? your relationships are distressed, suffering from post traumatic stress, slowly going bizerk. military culture created a stigma but you swallow your pride and reach out to get some help. the va, va puts you on a waiting list even though your a danger to yourself. veterans affairs gives you a death sentence, waiting months to years for mental health. the va, va puts you on a waiting list, now you killed yourself.
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12. |
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Manifestations Of Combat Induced PTSD
While stationed in Iraq I couldn't help but to notice that I was losing my mind.
So I just followed that mind of mine around so it wouldn't be hard to find.
I'd hold conversations with myself between a robot and the son of God.
On convoys behind a ma-duece, I'd do this, I kid you not
That's where I created Jesus and the almighty robot.
That was back in 2005 and a lot has happened since then.
Was married living in San Francisco when the PTSD had settled in.
I was depressed and having dissociative spells so we had ourselves a son.
That helped keep me from visiting the Golden Gate Bridge, not to admire but to jump from.
Without Sarah and Emmett around a suicide would've been done.
After awhile we moved to Petaluma where we would have a couple daughters.
I had to keep those post traumatic stress demons of mine at bay to be a good father.
Juniper Frances and Meridian Jean help me to keep it together.
A knitted sweater for treacherous weather, I think I'm feeling better.
So now we live in Pittsburgh and I'm trying to get used to it all.
It's nice to experience seasons, the color leafs change in the fall.
And I find it strange that the snow helps me to actually feel at ease.
Moving out east from the west has brought me a certain peace.
Even though I can feel the PTSD inside gnawing at me.
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13. |
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PTSD (Military Sexual Trauma)
Soldier Jane got her discharge papers from her time in the military. She developed a disability, ptsd. Suffering from military sexual trauma, the VA didn’t take her seriously and so the claim was denied, PTSD.
PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. Post traumatic stress, PTSD.
Soldier Joe got brand new orders to deploy with his unit overseas. He’ll come back if he comes back at all with PTSD. Another victim of military sexual trauma, thanks to his squared away battle buddies. There was no training for this enemy, PTSD.
PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. Post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD.
PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. Post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD.
The barracks are battlefield, where so many get assaulted sexually. The reported and unreported, PTSD. To those who are scared to speak up because of the chain of command hierarchy, there will be consequences, PTSD.
PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. Post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD.
PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. Post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD.
PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. PTSD. Post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD.
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14. |
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Yellow Ribbons Don't Heal War Wounds
Yellow ribbons don’t heal wounds but can be used to strangle you or I could introduce my fist to that smug fucking face and when I see a yellow ribbon, whether a sticker, button or magnet. I wanna thank you for your support by smacking them in the face.
Yellow ribbons can’t heal war wounds, won’t heal war wounds.
Yellow ribbons can’t heal war wounds, don’t heal war wounds.
You wanna thank me for my service, I wanna gouge out your fucking eyes and throw a party for when you die.
Yellow ribbons can’t heal war wounds, won’t heal war wounds.
Yellow ribbons can’t heal war wounds, don’t heal war wounds.
Please tell me again, how freedom isn’t free. I’ll fantasize about removing your spleen. Like doctor king, I have a dream.
Yellow ribbons can’t heal war wounds, won’t heal war wounds.
Yellow ribbons can’t heal war wounds, don’t heal war wounds.
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15. |
Compostable Nightmares
02:09
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Compostable Nightmares
compostable nightmares are going to haunt you, compostable nightmares are going to taunt you, compostable nightmares evolve when you close your eyes, compostable nightmares take over when you go sleepy time, compostable nightmares are all up in your head space, compostable nightmares are worn on your fucking face, compostable nightmares are so organic, compostable nightmares fuck up your sleep habits, compostable nightmares cause you to take medication, compostable nightmares create a need for sedation, compostable nightmares can turn that smile into a frown, compostable nightmares will make you want to punch a clown, compostable nightmares are waiting for you when you go to sleep, compostable nightmares it doesn’t matter what you eat, compostable nightmares can turn you into a cutter, compostable nightmares are no good dream fuckers, compostable nightmares you get them from combat, compostable nightmares i got mine from iraq, compostable nightmares are great for surfacing trauma, compostable nightmares make you want to run to momma, compostable nightmares help you to remember stuff, compostable nightmares won’t let you forget stuff, compostable nightmares i need to let them out, compostable nightmares in my head and they won’t get out, compostable nightmares going put a hole into my head, compostable nightmares maybe your better off dead, compostable nightmares going to write exit here on the bullet, compostable nightmares my fingers on the trigger and i’m going to pull it.
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Jesus & The Robot Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
We decided collectively to form a super band and to take over the world by making catchy and undeniably beautiful songs about an assortment of things. We figured that it will only be a matter of time before the our music spreads like a deadly wildfire that wipes out much plantation and housing thus causing much ruin. ... more
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